Section 1. Purpose

To ensure that individuals seeking the highest offices in the United States are held to the most rigorous standards of verification, oversight, and transparency, thereby upholding public trust in our democratic institutions.

Section 2. Establishment of the Federal Election Board (FEB)

A new independent body, the Federal Election Board (FEB), is hereby established and empowered to:

  • Certify the eligibility of all candidates for the United States House of Representatives, Senate, Vice President, and President.
  • Monitor elected officials’ compliance with ongoing qualification standards.
  • Enforce penalties for non-compliance, including disqualification, public shaming, or financial sanctions.

Section 3. Eligibility Requirements for Candidacy

To qualify for certification by the FEB, a candidate must:

(a) Age and Citizenship Documentation

  • Be at least 35 years of age at the time of filing for office.
  • Present original birth certificate. Certified copies, notarized statements, or affidavits will not be accepted.
  • Present two forms of identification, including:
    • A valid United States Passport, and
    • A U.S. State-issued Driver’s License or non-driver ID card.

(b) Residency and Identity Verification

  • Submit Federal Census records from at least three separate decades as proof of enduring presence in the U.S.
  • Provide five separate documents, dated across ten years, from the following:
    • Bank or credit union account statements (originals with ink signatures).
    • Mortgage agreements or rental contracts with notarized landlord affidavits.
    • Health insurance cards from federally recognized carriers.
    • IRS or State-issued tax returns for the past 15 years.
    • W2s, 1099s, property tax receipts, or utility bills in their name.

(c) Submission Timeline

  • All documents must be submitted to the FEB no later than one year prior to the official filing date for candidacy.

Section 4. Ongoing Scrutiny and Behavioral Oversight

If certified and subsequently elected, the candidate agrees to:

  • Monthly submission of all financial records to the FEB, including but not limited to:
    • Checking, savings, brokerage, retirement, and custodial accounts.
    • Loan statements, investment disclosures, and cryptocurrency holdings.
  • Random drug and alcohol testing, administered no less than once per quarter and up to weekly at the discretion of the FEB.
  • Consent to real-time monitoring of:
    • Phone call logs and metadata (content optional).
    • All bank transactions via continuous API access.
    • Internet activity logs, anonymized GPS data, and digital purchases.
    • Any other digital activity that is traceable not previously listed in this Act, or digital activity that becomes trackable after this Act is signed.
  • All data access will be monitored by an independent third party, and overseen by a rotating citizens’ tribunal.
    • The third party will be approved by a commission consisting of 10 House Representatives, 10 Senators and 10 US Governors, with a mandatory 5 Democratic and 5 Republican members in each of the 3 categories.

Section 5. Additional Overbearing Requirements

Candidates must also:

  1. Pass a 12-hour written examination covering:
    • U.S. history, ethics, and ancient Greek philosophy.
    • Basic arithmetic without calculator access.
    • Logic puzzles and moral dilemma scenarios evaluated by a panel of philosophers.
  2. Undergo a live, televised polygraph test, answering questions submitted via public online poll.
  3. Submit handwritten diaries from their past 10 years, scanned and indexed.
  4. Provide a blood sample to create a federal biometric profile stored in perpetuity.
  5. Spend 48 continuous hours in a sensory deprivation chamber under observation, to test resilience.
  6. Swear a public oath, under penalty of perjury, that they have never knowingly enjoyed a Nickelback song.

Section 6. Penalties for Non-Compliance

  • Failure to comply results in immediate revocation of candidacy or office.
  • All related campaign funds must be forfeited to the National Debt Fund.
  • Offending individuals will be added to a Federal List of Shame, publicly posted online with heat maps.